that’s brilliants !

I hate talking on aim. That probably has to do with me having no friends. It’s easier to type a few brilliants cursory words to someone rather than calling them and actually engaging in some sort of human to human interaction. Ew. Who does that? I heard that’s how you get Herpagonasyphlaids.

But then, I can’t avoid Gmail and it’s brilliants evil compadre google-talk. I log onto Gmail to sort through spam because it’s another something that gives me a sense of belonging and meaning and someone brilliants messages me.

I think, “Brilliants Damnit! I’m at work and can’t talk,” but then chat some anyway since anything is better than work.

Blah. The whole “point” is that my old roommate msged me and kept saying “brilliants.” Not in place of ‘brilliance’, he was using it in place of the word ‘brilliant,’ which made it infinitely more irritating. Like, “UCLA played brilliants.” Or “drinking beer is a brilliants idea.”

Now it’s stuck in my head. That bastard. Damn him and his brilliants retarded genius.

It’s Friday. Don’t forget to ridicule and mock those who are different to make yourself feel better. That’s pure brilliance.

friday

Bad to worse to e-coli

I don’t have much. Things that would be considered minor to other folks are like “HOLY, FUCKBLAMMO, WOW! that’s brilliants [sic]! it’s so cool. so cool…” So when the Baby Chu-er Chewer tells me I can blog about the mundane and disheartening, I was bouncing off the ceiling.

Off the fucking ceiling!!

She gives me a login and I excitedly read the three posts already there. I think for a couple hours about what I’m going to say. With trembling hands I click the Write Post link

You do not have permission to do this cuz you suck. Loser.

Goddamnit. I thought I was part of something. It was just a trick for Vegan Girl to feel better at my expense.

Anyway, I’m here now and I brought drarwlings. I drew this a while ago. It seems appropriate. Also seems like emo:

How To

Lunching on patios

Living in California makes you underestimate the power of nature. Oh, I’m not talking about weather so much as the foul types of creatures that you might encounter when, let’s say, your co-worker decides “It’s a nice day. Why don’t we sit outside?” So, I got the number for my food, found a covered table, and figured that at most, I’d have to worry about a slight wind.

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Oink Oink

I am a receptionist at a tech company. Because I fear one day turning into a fat, lazy slob, I try to go to the gym during my lunch hour, which leaves me little time to eat. I’ve taken to eating lunch at the front desk and thought little of it because many people here eat lunch at their desks.

Today, as I sat here eating my sandwich, an employee walked by taking a HUGE bite of his sandwich, and clumsily holding a soda in the other. Said employee is actually quite attractive (much more attractive than me), however that visual was wholly off-putting.

I eat lunch at my desk a LOT– the front desk. There are security cameras monitoring the lobby where I sit … at all times.

I just dropped mayonnaise-y sandwich filling on my dry-clean-only pants …

… near the crotchal area.

My first post on Sad-Sigh

I live in the middle of nowhere, Scotland. I’ve been told by a friend who went to Kenyon and lived in Gambier, OH (pop. 85) that this is not the middle of nowhere, but for a girl who has lived in nearly every big city in America, having your nearest city be Dundee (nickname: Scumdee) and living right next to a field full of sheep isn’t really the ideal situation, especially considering the population that I’m stuck with every single bloody day of my life.

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