More like POOPOSITION 8! Am I right? Am I right??

This is an excerpt of a comment by fellow Sad-Sigher, the Caridean, re: Grace’s stupid homosexual post.

Sad Sigh blog’s official position on gay marriage: Life is sad enough. Don’t make it bigoted too.

Second official position on gay marriage: We like gays to be happy and lift us up. Sad gays do not lift.

Well… here’s the thing.  It’s not so much that we Sad Gays aren’t able to lift you folks because we’re not allowed to get married, (although we aren’t… to both).  It’s more that we haven’t been going to the gym, and we’ve been stress eating cupcakes and copious amounts of Fage, because of a certain election that just happened.

However, now that the election is over, the gym is calling.  Give us a couple of weeks, and we’ll be back to <3% body fat, biceps like hungry pythons, and looking at each other in the steam room.  The latter is already beginning! Continue reading

I’ll lift you back up, gays!

In the big picture, there was nothing sad about last night’s election results – we elected Barack Obama as our next president. Enough said. Bring on the change.

And yet, in a country where we can overcome eight years of hell and embarrassment – thank god my pledge of ignorance is coming to an end – we’ve suddenly taken a huge step back. I was fearful I had to be ashamed of being an American, but for sure I’m ashamed to be one in the state of California. I’ve always known there were pockets of scary here, but I never really associated them with my neighbors, or people I work with, or the people I went to school with. In my mind, because I had gravitated toward the liberal, I naively assumed the rest of the state was behind me too.

Last night’s feeling of “the rest of them finally get it” turned into sadness as the California results trickled in: Animal rights, yes. Abortion rights, yes. Same-sex marriage, no. What. The. Fuck.

I went to sleep with 62% of the precincts reporting on Prop 8, hoping they had just left out the good ones and woke up at 5 am nervous, and then 10 am disappointed. I was hoping to use this picture as an unusual sign of celebration on this site to rejoice about all the upcoming gay weddings I would attend with open bar and copious boys to fulfill my dream of being lifted by a group of gays.

Lifted by a gay on July 4th

Instead, with sadness, I will have to use this picture to encourage people to come lift me at MY future wedding, which is rude. Or, I can promise to do more next time to help lift up my gays, if not for equal rights for everybody, then for my growing obsession of being gloriously lifted. I mean, look at that picture, look at how happy I am. And fuck you, 52%, for denying my right to lifted by gays, single or married (but preferably married because the more gays to lift, the better).

CBD Update 1

So.

My first text came at 11:01 this morning saying that they ‘*may* have a date for me with Zachary Sun between 7 & 10 pm.  Immensely curious, I promptly logged in and confirmed the date.  When asked what my choice of neighborhood was, I selected Hell’s Kitchen (natch) and proceeded to pick out a few bars I was either familiar with, or truly enjoyed before.  I got another confirmation text saying that he’d like to make some changes, so he suggested fancy bars in Union Square and the Flatiron.

Well… this is what I know of him from the website.  His name is Zachary.  He’s 26.  (Dating someone my age… what a novel idea.)  He’s Jewish, and from the South.  (I’m a sucker for southern boys.)  He’s either a lawyer or a law student.  Well, I figure if he’s a lawyer, I’m going to let him pick the fancy bar, because I’m also going to let him pick up the tab, me being piss poor and all.

Here’s the thing that makes this Sad.Sigh worthy; (although this entire process has been semi-awesome?) in the original text message it says, ‘… date with Zachary Sun btw 7 & 10 pm’.  I thought the dude’s name was Zachary Sun, and my initial reaction was, ‘Fuck!  Not another Asian!’

Just goes to show how open minded I am, hate criming before I’ve met.

More to come.

Customer service agents should stick to the script

I just called to confirm my reservation for Budget Truck and after I said my name he said “Gesundheit” and chuckled to himself. Annoyed, I paused, said “Thanks” and proceeded to put Budget Truck representatives on my shit list. With my luck, they won’t even have the truck available for me to pick up, thereby sabotaging my attempt to leave Los Angeles. Jerks.