Category Archives: Makes Me Wanna Die

Would you like some cheese with my whine?

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So, this is going to be a boring post where basically all I’m going to do is whine. There you go, that’s my warning. Grace said it’ll make me not want to die so much, so I’ll give it a try.

I don’t know why I jumped from one job that I constantly complained about right into another. My last job I loved my work but hated the people. This job the people are nice but the work isn’t quite matched with my skillset or interest, which I should’ve known but I was just determined to get a new job. I think I want out of the non-profit arts, start-up mentality world. I think I need a “get well” job even though I’m not in rehab or anything. Maybe working at a cute little bookstore in the Castro where I can’t take any work home with me, and have time to really focus on my social life (priorities, bitch!) and some creative projects on the side.

I was home in San Jose last weekend and out at this gay club called Splash and I realized San Jose gays are weird! But then I started thinking what if I just stayed in San Jose, and grew into one of them; shaved my head, got a tattoo on my neck and still plucked my eyebrows. Maybe I would fit in? They seemed so happy…

Nah, I’m much more of the trashed out, drugged up, screaming queen San Francisco type. Or maybe I should move to the desert like I’ve been feeling so compelled to do for some reason (I wonder what desert gays are like?!)

All I know is I need more excitement in my life. While I was at Splash dancing with some guy that I didn’t even like who left HIS SWEAT STAINS ON MY SHIRT, my best friend was texting me about her threesome with 2 Aussie guys in Las Vegas. Bitch.

Hmm, my wanting-to-die meter went down from like an 8 to a 7. Maybe you’re right about this sad.sigh posting thing, Grace.;) Sorry guys, you might just be hearing more from me in the next few days…

When it rains, it pours

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Without identifying what I do, where I work, and who I am, in the past week the following things happened to me in no particular order:

1) I was not paid. This was not the first time I was late getting paid. It will certainly not be the last. I drove 25 minutes to the company’s bank to cash my check as I did not want to risk it bouncing.
2) My office was evicted. I now work from home. It was 88 degrees today. I have no A/C at home.
3) I had a movie moment when upon dropping off my boss, she opened the passenger door, and a biker slammed into it. Nobody was hurt, the biker scolded my boss and rode off. My door, on the other hand, did not fair as well. Brought it to the shop today and the window made a bad noise rolling up and down, the door didn’t shut all the way, and the window tint was scraped. Upon loosening the inner panel, a chunk of foam fell out. Closer inspection showed the door hinge had also snapped. I don’t want to find out how much it will cost. My poor car still smells like new (or manure, depending on who you are); these are its first war wounds.

So, sorry Dennis. While you were out drinking with those who lost their jobs, I was without internet helping pack up my office, unable to comment on your posts. You passive-aggressive, smooth, flat surfaced SOB.

My Good Friends, the Lehman Brothers

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So, Lehman Brothers, Merrill Lynch, AIG, and WaMu are all big sponsors of ours at work; this week has definitely not been a great one for job confidence.

My favorite of all of these companies to work with has definitely been Lehman Brothers.  I’ve had a great relationship with all of the people in their Philanthropy team, and I was actually quite depressed throughout the first half of the week after the bankruptcy announcement.

Which leads me to ask – when did I become so invested in the corporate world?  Since when is it okay for me to count major financial institutions amongst my best friends?  I find myself consoling everyone I know that works in the banking world, and doing much commisseration and drowning of sorrows.  What’s next?  Taking AIG out to get hookers and booze because the government has been up their ass all week?

Let’s hope not, because I hear that AIG gets really crazy when they’re drunk.