Before heading to India I got all sorts of shots and vaccinations but the disease I was most worried about was malaria since I am prone to mosquito bites. Both Daniel and I opted for Mefloquine tablets (even though he said I’d be his bug repellent) to help fight off malaria if exposed to it. But they say prevention is the best solution, by wearing long clothing, spraying repellents, and using mosquito nets. Long sleeves and repellents were usually enough for me until we arrived at Moti Hotel in Mumbai, probably the grossest hotel we’ve stayed in, and the first place I feared getting eaten alive at night. It was a combination of Mumbai being hot and humid, having the quintessential Indian bathroom that had no separate shower stall, so water got everywhere (to stand and breed mosquitos), and a creepy open window that seemed to allow anything to come in (no terrorists, please).

After having my face attacked by mosquitos during my sleep in Greece my friend bought me a mosquito net as a joke, and I held on to it for years, until I finally felt I would need it in India, and whipped it out in Mumbai. At the time, Daniel was dying a slow death from some mysterious throat infection aka social disease, and was on a combination of medications, including Mefloquine which contributed to his delirium. The side effects include “strange dreams” and I’ve heard stories of hallucinations involving Tinkerbell. Both of us had reported to each other stranger dreams than normal when on Mefloquine.

That night, he woke and asked me “did you feel that?” and I said “What?” and he said “Something just landed on me.” After a bit he realized it was a dream, and in that dream I had casually told him it was a “land on” and said land on was a glow-in-the-dark flip flop. He also recalled me running crazily around the bed.

Prior to bed I had put the net over my face but realized I could not breath easily since gravity sort of left the net draped over my nose/mouth. I put on my hat, hoping the brim would provide enough space to breathe, and went to sleep on my back, because it was awkward sleeping on my side with the hat on. The bathroom door was closed (to prevent mosquitos from flying through the window at us) but a sliver of light still came through. It was enough to provide some lighting for the room. Daniel was lucky and had to take the Mefloquine that night, putting him at risk for strange dreams. So when he woke in the middle of the night and saw me, sleeping with my contraption, snoring because I was on my back, he freaked the fuck out, and reported silent terror at the black mask beside him.

Imagine this, but filled with a pale face, in the darkness:

A real picture might exist, but Daniel claims he was respectful enough not to film me snoring madly through my mask.