Self-Destruction

Financial Crisis!

Last night I actually kissed a piece of mail for the first time.
I got my check for my 2nd job.  It was 5 days late.  I kissed it because I had been freaking out all week.  I don’t get paid until next Wednesday and I had $30 in my bank account and no food.  There [...]


More Reasons to Keep My Damn Mouth Shut

I spent a long, long day at Bumbershoot, Seattle’s excellent arts, comedy and music festival, where we saw many, many excellent bands.  My friend EZ and I had decided to see the guys from Human Giant as our comedy selection, but it turned out David Cross was a surprise addition to the comedy lineup. [...]


What ails ye?

On a whim, I went back into our archives and looked up everything in the category ‘decrepit’.
From the post ‘Utterly, Disgustingly Decrepit’:
Then lo, this morning, I woke up by getting a Charlie horse in my right calf muscle.  It was so fucking painful I wanted to die.
So now I’m limping on BOTH SIDES of my [...]


Even my body hates me (or, ESPECIALLY my body hates me)

Last week I went to the doctor, all wheezy from some asthma caused by seasonal allergies. Thinking I’d just get prescribed another inhaler, I told the doctor the issue, she listened to my breathing, and then freaked the hell out and put me on a steroidal medication to try and get the inflamation in [...]


Jager is not for 23 year olds

There are few things sadder than waking up on your friend’s couch with your makeup still half on, realizing you did a shot of Jager last night like a fucking 18 year old sororiety girl.
The first time I was ever drunk I was actually 17, but the liquor of choice was Jager and peach schnapps.  [...]